Slaying is On My Mind

I thought to myself

50 plus poems about me, what is one more?

So, now that I have acknowledged my self-love

Let's dive into this poem

Sometimes

When I close my eyes

A beautiful image rises

Of a made-up face

Flawless, snatched

The kind I imagine would attract a gaze

Or two

She looks good boo

I say to myself

The eyes are the colour of the sky

A shimmer and a matte

Catching the light just right

They are hooded by curly and dramatic falsies

Crowned by well-gelled penciled brows

And boy can those lashes fly!

These black wings are flying high

In this vision,

My face is a mask

Golden undertones and eye-catching highlights

Who is this girl?

She is me but she is not me

Gasp!

The lips are glam,

Peachy and shiny like candy

I bet they taste like gum

Fresh, sweet and bang!

In this half-dream

A mustard jumpsuit hugs my figure politely

Showing off some collar bone and one shoulder

It is well-trimmed and pristine

Something a drag queen would kill to own

Down south

Is a snakeskin clear mule heel

The toe is pointed, classy and ideal

What more can a girl ask for?

Up north

I’m wearing a sleek bun

Something only you could see on a Vogue magazine

And to wrap it all up is a pair of statement gold earrings with pearls

I look good, I feel like a star

In reality

A full made-up face doesn’t seem right

A designer mustard jumpsuit is many many dollars away

Clear mule heels I’ve got, they aren’t snakeskin though

Sometimes, I almost achieve that sleek bun on my natural hair

I have statement gold earrings, but I need new ones!

I am a material girl

But unless I win the lotto

I have a million other things to do before I fully invest in slaying

So, for now, I am content to slay on the inside

Before I can slay on the outside as per my dream

It’s The Lessons That Matter

I loved the stuff that makes romantic novels ROMANTIC!

My favourite was a rustic scenery,

Featuring a rough somewhat handsome enigmatic cowboy,

Who was aloof, sad on the inside and hard on the outside,

He loved his horse better than he loved human beings.

Yes, he had been hurt,

But,

Right under his nose was the damsel who was going to rescue him,

Only he didn’t know it!

And once the rescuing was done and the dating began,

Fire-lit lovemaking on the floor was ten times more intriguing than candle-lit hanky panky in the sheets,

Yes, I lived for romance novels once,

When men, love, and the jiggy jiggy were all a mystery to me.

In retrospect,

I wish I had stayed in that naivety,

But I have to convince myself that it is the lessons that matter,

Because maybe they do

A broken heart mends, but it remains scarred forever.

That is the first lesson to love, it’s the risk of immersing yourself in the oh-so-sweet fever.

Second lesson: never give your all to someone,

For those like me that love with everything they have, we will always hurt the hardest.

Keeping your expectations realistic is the third lesson,

Hard work and the acceptance of flaws keep the fire of real love burning.

Yet,

Trouble can get in the way of real love if you don’t know who you are without your partner,

And that makes the fourth lesson: know who you are.

Similar to this is finding happiness within yourself,

Depending on your partner for happiness is ridiculous!

The problem with fictional love is the concept that love can fix people.

If you cannot have an alcoholic boyfriend, then do not date one,

It is that simple!

Thinking that you can love him and try to change him in the process is madness,

Only he can change himself, remember that!

The media has sold us a lot of lies,

Sadly, we’ve eaten them up without thinking twice,

From don’t date a man who cheats and borrows your money

to a man that doesn’t buy you romantic dinners doesn’t deserve you.

Young women have entered the dating scene with extremely high expectations,

Only to find out that men do not have superpowers.

They are weak, clueless at times, and broke other times.

Just like you, they are HUMAN,

Just like you, they make mistakes,

Just like you, they are trying to save and cannot afford luxury dinners at all times.

My point here is not to let men off the hook,

My point is to tell women to wisen up,

Lower your expectations,

Better yet, don’t expect what you cannot bring to the table yourself!

And so, as my heart heals,

It whispers to me the lessons it has learned,

It reminds me how far I’ve come.

Also, it finds folly in my previous way of thinking,

The things I took for granted, the desires I yearned.

Besides cultivating forgiveness, caution, and happiness,

My heart has one major purpose,

To help me in becoming the best version of myself,

With the hope that my future partner is doing the same!